It Will Get Easier.

🌿 It Will Get Easier: My Journey Through Postnatal Depression, Art, and Motherhood

In 2020, I had my second daughter. The world was locked down, my toddler was full of beans, and I was drowning in hormones, isolation, and exhaustion. Postnatal depression crept in quietly, then roared. There were days I felt like I was disappearing, beneath nappies, night feeds, and the relentless pressure to be okay.

I wasn’t okay.

And I want to say that out loud, because maybe you’re not okay either. Maybe you’re reading this with a baby on your chest and a toddler screaming in the next room, wondering how anyone survives this season. I see you.

🌧️ What My Postnatal Depression Looked Like

It didn’t show up as tears for me, not at first. It showed up as anger. A short fuse. A constant sense of being on edge. I was reactive, snappy, and overwhelmed by even the smallest things. I made countless calls to the doctor, desperate for help but unsure what help even looked like.

I was offered medication early on, but it took me a year to say yes. I saw it as “giving in.” But the truth? Saying yes was my first real step toward healing. And it helped massively. Especially as I was returning to work at the time, full-time, in the middle of trying to hold everything together.

That first year back was brutal. I was juggling shift work, two young children, and a mental health state that felt like it was hanging by a thread. Organising childcare around ever-changing shifts felt impossible. I was constantly rearranging, constantly apologising, constantly feeling like I was failing; at work, at home, as a mum, as a human.

Eventually, I made a decision that changed everything: I dropped a day. I went part-time. I still work shifts, but now I have set days, which makes childcare (and life) so much more manageable. That one change gave me breathing space. It gave me back a sense of control.

🧠 The Weight of a Toxic Friendship

There was another layer to my struggle, one I don’t want to go too deeply into, but it mattered. I was carrying the weight of a toxic friendship. One that drained me emotionally and mentally.

Letting go was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. We had history. We were close. But releasing that relationship gave me back peace. I could sleep again. I felt lighter. It’s true what they say: if someone is dragging you down, it’s okay to let go. You deserve friendships that lift you, not ones that demand too much or leave you feeling unwell.

I’m so thankful for the support network I have now. The people in my life today? I honestly couldn’t live without them. They bring out the best in me, and I hope I do the same for them.

🎨 Finding Art, Finding Myself

Somewhere in the fog, I found art. Or maybe art found me. It started as a quiet escape; doodles, playful interpretations that didn’t ask anything of me. Slowly, it became a lifeline. A way to express what I couldn’t say. A way to feel like me again.

Now, my girls are 4 and 7. Life is still a juggle, shift work, school runs, and running my art busines, but it’s a juggle I can handle. I feel motivated. Proactive. I get to share my art not just online, but in person through workshops that light me up. I get to create spaces where others can feel seen, soothed, and inspired.

💬 To the Parents in the Thick of It

People used to say to me, “It will get easier.” I didn’t believe them. But they were right. It does get easier. Not perfect. Not painless. But easier.

Love is messy. Hormones are real. There are still weeks that knock me sideways. But I’ve found my way. And you will too.

If you’re struggling, please know this: you’re not broken. You’re not failing. You’re becoming. And that takes time.

🕊️ What Helped Me

• Art: Not for perfection, but for play. For expression. For healing.

• Honesty: Saying “I’m not okay” was the first step toward being okay.

• Medication: It wasn’t weakness—it was support. And it worked.

• Work-life tweaks: Dropping a day gave me breathing space. It changed everything.

• Letting go: Releasing toxic relationships gave me peace.

• Connection: Whether through workshops or quiet chats, sharing my story helped me feel less alone.

• Time: It’s cliché, but true. Time softened the edges.

• Support network: The people around me now? They’re everything.

🤍 A Final Note

If any part of this resonates with you, if you’re in the thick of it, or just need someone to talk to, I’m always here. I can’t promise I’ll have the answers, but I will listen. And I may just understand.

Emma

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📸 A Note About the Images

Every photo you see here was taken while I was battling. Battling postnatal depression. Battling exhaustion. Battling the weight of things I couldn’t always name.Not everything is as it appears. So if you ever find yourself comparing, wondering how other parents seem to have it “all together”—please remember this. Sometimes the brightest smiles hide the heaviest hearts. You’re not alone.